Do you have one of those friends that make you laugh so hard that the coffee you are drinking shoots out through your nostrils and sometimes make you lose your breath or pee your pants? I have a friend like that. Maggie is a trip to say the least. She is a natural. She is well into her senior years, struggles with hearing and vision, but young at heart and has more piss and vinegar than anyone I know. I met her early one morning as she knocked on my apartment door, asking if I had a phone she could use. Turns out she needed to call a friend to pick her up for work because her car was being towed away as we stood there in the kitchen. It was a dumb car anyways.
That was 27 years ago and let me tell you, it’s been a fun ride. We have seen each other through thick and thin in more ways than one. We always made ends meet and managed to live high on the hog, if only in our hearts and mind. We would scrape our change and bottles together, coming up with enough moola to have a prime rib dinner at the VFW Hall on Saturday night. Maggie introduced me to Sally’s Boutique, AKA: Salvation Army. We were the best dressed chicks in town – on a dime. To this very day we are loyal Sally’s shoppers, forever on the lookout for a steal, the perfect outfit or accessory.
Well today took the cake and will be laughed about for decades to come. Maggie and I planned a girl day for garage sale-ing. Being the domestic goddesses that we are, can't resist a bargain, especially if it enhances our living space. Nesting comes natural for us so when the perfect piece of furniture, picture, vase, coverlet, trinket or whatnot crosses our path, we are finding a way to get it. Period.
Being the eager beavers that we are, decided to get an early start. The agenda was full. We had visiting to do, dozens of garage sales to scour and then we had to eat. The plan was for me to arrive at her house at 7:30 am. Maggie was so excited she got up at 3:15 am to make sure she was showered, dolled up and ready to go. And, she had to make sure to get her fill of television Texas Hold ‘Em in before I showed up.
With breakfast and visiting under our belts, we were on our way. We are just like little kids getting the deals and finding the perfect thing to enhance our life. It was the absolute best time ever, and then, 'the incident'. We stop at the church sale and there lay a beautiful pile of rugs outside the church door. I am in the market for some rugs and Maggie asked the lady how much they were. She said it was a free-will donation. Fair enough. I unrolled the largest rug to take a closer look. It was a gorgeous rug along with all the coordinates of various sizes. A perfect find if those rugs would work, but they wouldn’t, so I told Maggie that I wasn’t going to get them. Maggie said it was a steal of a deal and she was going to take them. And that is exactly what she did. Together, we loaded up her little car – rugs hanging out the back. We then go into the church to look around. I made a purchase and we left. We get back to her place, discussing and showing off all of our treasures from the day, I ask her how much she gave for the rugs.
With breakfast and visiting under our belts, we were on our way. We are just like little kids getting the deals and finding the perfect thing to enhance our life. It was the absolute best time ever, and then, 'the incident'. We stop at the church sale and there lay a beautiful pile of rugs outside the church door. I am in the market for some rugs and Maggie asked the lady how much they were. She said it was a free-will donation. Fair enough. I unrolled the largest rug to take a closer look. It was a gorgeous rug along with all the coordinates of various sizes. A perfect find if those rugs would work, but they wouldn’t, so I told Maggie that I wasn’t going to get them. Maggie said it was a steal of a deal and she was going to take them. And that is exactly what she did. Together, we loaded up her little car – rugs hanging out the back. We then go into the church to look around. I made a purchase and we left. We get back to her place, discussing and showing off all of our treasures from the day, I ask her how much she gave for the rugs.
She looked at me totally confused and said “what do you mean, they were a free, goodwill donation”. She thought they were free. Yep, you got it. She ripped off the church. Two woman driving down the road – in broad daylight, with stolen goods hanging out of the trunk. We were like Bonnie and Clyde making our getaway. I mean if you are going to steal at a garage sale, a church would be the best bet. They probably just figured we were poor hopeless women that needed those rugs.
It doesn’t end there. I left to go home . Maggie, the woman of integrity that she is, hi-tailed it back to the church to tell of her side of the story. Well those church ladies laughed themselves silly, accepted Maggie’s donation and that’s that.
love it!!
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